Dear Cupid's Nemesis

Love? A waste of time. Look, I know I've got the goods - that's no mystery. I could have any woman I wanted. But why would I want to do that? Sure, they look good, but the petty fighting, the headaches, the fury - WOMEN ARE TYRANTS! We all know its true. So here's the dilemma: one of my closest friends is in love! I tried to get him to come to his senses, but this temptress has him mesmerized. HOW CAN I SAVE HIM?

Sincerely,

Cupid's Nemesis

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Dear Cupid's Nemesis:

I am so glad we are on the same page! Love is a trick of the mind, and women are such a hassle! My goodness! You are in a vile situation, I cannot lie. Your friend has a poisoned mind that must be remedied as quick as possible. I suggest paying the woman to leave. Of course, you must be wealthy, which could be a dilemma. I mean, you could always go the old-fashioned way and hurt her so badly that he will never want to look at her or any woman again. This does depend on how far you are willing to go. Not everyone can be as evil as me! My final suggestion is to find another man, one that is charming and good-looking, and shares all of this women's interests. Set them up, and voila! The temptress falls in love with another man, and your best friend is saved - cured of the poison that is love in his mind. Better to have strangers fall into the misery that comes with love than your closest friend! 

Best of luck,

Don John

Shakespeare Facts

My favourite facts about Shakespeare...

1. Shakespeare died on his 52nd birthday. How unfortunate.
2. Shakespeare was married when he was 17. His wife, Anne Hathaway, was 26. Scandalous!
3. The epitaph on his grave curses anyone who tries to move his bones. Even Shakespeare was a twisted man. It reads: Good friend for Jesus’ sake forbear,
   To dig the dust enclosed here:
   Blest be the man that spares these stones,
   And curst be he that moves my bones.
4. William Arden, one of Shakespeare's relatives, was arrested for plotting against the Queen, imprisoned in the Tower of London, and executed. Should he have been?
5. During a performance of Henry VIII, a cannon shot set fire to Shakespeare's Globe Theatre in 1613.
6. Suicide occurs 13 time in Shakespeare's plays. The most well-known suicide occurs in Romeo and Juliet, where they both kill themselves. 
7. All London theatre were closed between 1592 and 1594 because of an outbreak of the plague.
8. Shakespeare's father, John, was prosecuted 4 times for illegal trading of wool and money-lending. Evil runs in the family, so I see.
9. Many of Shakespeare's sonnets are self-loathing and bitter, although sonnets are usually love poems. Who needs love?!
10. All of Shakespeare's family were illiterate. How sad.

Hail, brave friend!

Hail, brave friend!

Come thou on my side and entreat for me as I undergo a plot to ruin the happiness of Hero and Claudio. Although I am the bastard brother of Don Pedro, I am still judicious! I will take him down, for I abhor him!

Now lead these graces to the grave, and leave the world no copy, for no one shall know about my plans!

Learn more about me.